Conditions of unconditional Guarantee

1. You (claimant) must be over 60 Years of age

2. Claimant must of had Grandmother on same Midnight Fishing Tour as well.

3. Grandmother must of caught more fish than Cuz & skulled more beer than James
    (Neither of which is hard to do)

4. Grandmother must have all own teeth (and no fillings)

5. Grandmother must not of gotten lost or kept crew waiting during wee stops.